When treating problematic sexual behaviors (PSB), mental health professionals always stress setting limits. Why? Because they help those in recovery create stability in their everyday lives. Boundaries teach us what is acceptable and what is not, thereby making it easier to avoid anything that can trigger relapse. Let’s take a closer look at the role of these boundaries and how they provide much-needed structure.
When we talk about setting boundaries in PSB recovery, we mean defining limits on behaviors, environments, and interactions. For example, say you’re aware that socializing with a particular group means facing alcohol, and that heightens your risk of engaging in PSB. To avoid this from happening, you may choose to steer clear of such gatherings or avoid alcohol altogether – both of these are limits that keep you out of danger.
While everyone’s experience with PSB is unique, there are certain types that are universally important. Each one provides structure to a different aspect of life, and together, they create a road map that keeps you on the path of recovery.
Personal boundaries involve setting limits on your own behaviors when engaging in certain activities, being in specific places, and facing particular situations. They stop you from being suddenly confronted with conditions that prompt unwanted urges.
Physical boundaries provide the facility to create a comfortable and trigger-free personal space. Think of these limits as a security blanket, cocooning you. For example, if you find hugging or shaking hands with others leads to uncontrollable feelings, you can limit this kind of physical touch.
Emotional boundaries protect your well-being, helping you avoid distressing emotions that can intensify the problematic urges to engage. However, to set such limits, you must first be able to recognize and understand the specific emotional triggers involved. Maintaining a journal or seeking professional help can help provide that kind of insight.
Relational boundaries cover your interactions with the people in your life, no matter if they are partners, family, or colleagues. While these limits are some of the most important, they are often the hardest to enforce. For one, they challenge established patterns, which can be challenging to change. They also provoke strong reactions, as some may feel offended. Here, clear communication and mutual respect are vital for laying down these rules.
Healthy boundaries after PSB treatment should not be thought of as limitations, stopping you from living life. They are tools that protect you so you can live to the fullest in the healthiest possible way. Yet, to be effective, they must be clear and enforced consistently in all aspects of your life, from personal to relational. With dedication, you can uphold these boundaries and keep your long-term recovery strong.
For more information about maintaining limits post-PSB recovery, visit Paradise Creek Recovery. Along with our residential programs for PSB, we offer a wealth of resources to assist those on their healing journey.
